Sadly, the lazy days of summer are gone and yet another NHL season is upon us. That damn NHL just doesn't stop. You think the league would take a year or two off, but noooooo! It has to keep coming back for more... year, after year, after year.

We'd like to just turn our backs to the league and its impending season, but we simply can't. And you know why we can't? That's right, it's because of you, our valued readers. Call it blind devotion. Call it unrequited love. Or call it a court-imposed sentence to public service that if we break we'd have to serve 12 to 18 months of hard time... whatever the reason, we do it for you. We know that if we weren't around you'd be forced to read the usual garbage written by such rags as The Hockey News, ESPNet, and the like. But because of us, you don't have to read their senseless trash. You can read our senseless trash. Together we can make a difference.

This issue kicks off our fourth year of NHL coverage. Along the way we've learned a lot. But luckily for us, we're not that bright and we usually forget everything over the summer. That way each season seems brand new. It helps keep things fresh.

We have managed to retain one small bit of information, tho'. Each season must be opened up with a Season Preview. That's, like, a rule or somethin'. So with that in mind, we've thrown together the following example of a Season Preview. It contains assorted feature articles and individual team reports for your reading enjoyment, all compiled in hopes of forecasting the events of the upcoming season.

As usual, when considering where teams will finish, two things weighed heavily in the decision making process: pills and booze. After long "deliberation", here's a quick rundown of how we think the 1997-98 NHL season will unfold. For a complete explanation of why teams were picked where they were, please read the individual team reports elsewhere in the issue.

EASTERN CONFERENCE

Atlantic Division: The Flyers are still the class of the division, but the Washington Capitals are on the rise.

(number in parenthesis is playoff spot)

1. Philadelphia Flyers (1)
2. Washington Capitals (3)
3. New Jersey Devils (4)
4. New York Rangers (6)
5. Florida Panthers (8)
6. New York Islanders
7. Tampa Bay Lightning

Northeast Division: Without Ted Nolan to keep the team together, the Sabres will suck. Picking Carolina first might be strong, but Gary Roberts will make them a winner.

1. Carolina Hurricanes (2)
2. Pittsburgh Penguins (5)
3. Montreal Canadiens (7)
4. Ottawa Senators
5. Buffalo Sabres
6. Boston Bruins

WESTERN CONFERENCE

Central Division: Dallas will again run away with things. Detroit is on the slide. St. Louis could surprise some people.

1. Dallas Stars (2)
2. Phoenix Coyotes (3)
3. Detroit Red Wings (4)
4. St. Louis Blues (5)
5. Chicago Blackhawks
6. Toronto Maple Leafs

Pacific Division: Colorado is still the best team in the league. The big news is that Anaheim will plummet without Ron Wilson to lead the way.

1. Colorado Avalanche (1)
2. Vancouver Canucks (6)
3. Edmonton Oilers (7)
4. San Jose Sharks (8)
5. Calgary Flames
6. Los Angeles Kings
7. Anaheim Mighty Ducks

Now's where we each usually make our Stanley Cup Finals predictions. So, like, here they are...

Michael Dell, editor-in-chief: Colorado will beat Dallas in the Western Conference Finals and Philadelphia will beat New Jersey in the East. That means for the third straight year I'm predicting Colorado to beat Philadelphia for the Stanley Cup. There's nothing quite like tradition.

Zippy, Wonder Chimp: Colorado will defeat the Phoenix Coyotes in five games to win the West. Philadelphia will beat Washington in six games in the Eastern Conference. In the Stanley Cup Finals, Colorado will school Philadelphia in five games.

Jim Iovino, Ace Reporter: Colorado will beat Dallas in seven games in the Western Conference Finals and Philadelphia will dispose of the NY Rangers in six in the East. The Stanley Cup Finals will witness Philadelphia defeating Colorado in six games.

Matthew Secosky, Chimp B: Colorado will beat Edmonton in the Western Conference Finals and Philadelphia will beat New Jersey in the East. As predicted by Michael Dell, Colorado will defeat Philadelphia in the Stanley Cup Finals.

Before we go, there's one final prediction we'd like to make for the coming season. An advanced race of space goats will descend on Earth and enslave all its inhabitants... except for the goats, of course, who will all be given positions of power.

One final note, the first issue of the new season will be Tuesday, October 7. But daily coverage on America Online will kick off on October 1.

Thank you.

[ issues | web extra | stats | nhl archive | home | chat | mailing list | about us | search | comments ]

1997 © Copyright LCS Hockey All Rights Reserved