Right wing is Grand Canyon deep. There are about 20 guys that could stake a reasonable claim to the top 10. The right side has speed, toughness, and the best pure goal scorers in hockey. Deciding amongst them wasn't easy. Most of the time it came down to one important factor: who could give us the worst beating? The pen may be mightier than the sword, but it doesn't do a whole hell of a lot against a crisp left hook. Brutality always wins out in the end.

Player Ratings The LCS Hockey Player Rating Extravaganza: Centers Left wings Right wings Defensemen Goaltenders

1. Todd Bertuzzi, Vancouver Canucks: They should have never brought him back to the mainland. Oh sure, it sounded like a good idea; introduce him to civilization, find really big skates, sell tickets to watch him play hockey. Nothing could go wrong, they said. He's a gentle giant, they said. Yeah, right. The next thing you know he's breaking his chains and rampaging through the NHL, overturning cars, swatting biplanes, and crushing defensemen beneath his massive paws. Save yourself while you can!

The man-beast that is Todd Bertuzzi was unleashed on an unsuspecting world last season, establishing new career-highs in goals (36), assists (49), and points (85). The 27-year-old native of Skull Island averaged 1.18 points per game, second to only Mario Lemieux's 1.29. Had the league not suspended him 10 games early in the season for leaving the bench to climb the Empire State Building, Bertuzzi could have stomped away with the Art Ross Trophy. It's just amazing he could score so much with Fay Wray clinging to his neck.

Bertuzzi is gargantuan. There's enough there for two big hockey players. He is, without question, the most dominating physical presence in the sport and the world's only hope against Godzilla. Opposing teams simply can't combat Bertuzzi's brute strength. It's unclear how he got so big. Some say it was voodoo, others favor the theory of a radiation experiment gone wrong. I can tell you one thing for sure, he didn't get that way by drinking a quart of gin each day and avoiding solid foods. I've been doing that for years and nothin'. Maybe I should up it to two quarts?

While he's a decent shooter, Bertuzzi's shot isn't on par with such legendary power forwards as Tim Kerr or Cam Neely. He gets most of his goals by barging the net and hammering home rebounds. He's connected for 14 power-play goals in each of the past two seasons. Defensemen are at his mercy in front of the cage. Perhaps this year teams should simply try and soothe his savagery with crates of bananas and rhythmic jungle drumming.

When puny humans aren't running for their lives, the ones that stay long enough to witness his play are astonished by Bertuzzi's skating and stickhandling. He has terrific straight-ahead speed and is surprisingly nimble for a thing his size. Defensemen that brace for a trampling often fall prey to a delicate toe-drag or a nifty inside-out maneuver.

It may seem silly ranking Bertuzzi No. 1 after only one great season, but it was a really great season. There's no doubt that if one were to poll NHL GMs, and I think we all know how painful that can be, they would say to a man that Bertuzzi is the right wing they'd most like to have on their respective clubs. Brian Burke and the Vancouver Canucks are extremely lucky to have him. Now if they can just get the Canadian Army to quit shooting at Bertuzzi each time he leaves the house...

2. Alexei Kovalev, Pittsburgh Penguins: The Russian military never devised a rifle as deadly as Pittsburgh's AK 27. Alexei Kovalev is positively frightening when he shoots the puck. It's not for the faint of heart. Children under 18 will not be admitted unless accompanied by an adult.

Kovalev has an absolute A-Bomb of a slap shot. UN weapons inspectors must be present whenever he plays. His wrister is equally destructive. Such power was honed through endless hours of dedicated practice. Kovalev is a peerless paradigm of shooting technique; each shot an artful lesson to behold. Witness the weight transfer. Marvel at the automation of the follow through; wrists turned over, blade pointing to target.

Kovalev's shot is a lot like the flu. It either hits you or it doesn't. There's not much a goaltender can do. Extra vitamin C won't help. Their only prayer is that Kovy cuts things too fine and misses the net. It's comical watching netminders react to being scored upon by Kovalev. Initially they're surprised that he scored because they usually don't even see the shot. Next there's a brief moment of disappointment in realizing that they have allowed a goal. This is quickly replaced by an overwhelming sense of relief in knowing that they weren't killed.

Once Kovalev learned to trust his shot, his production skyrocketed. His six years spent in New York were marred by inconsistency and unfulfilled potential. It's because he never shot the puck. Kovalev arrived in Pittsburgh with a new sense of purpose and a hair trigger. In six-plus years as a Blueshirt, Alexei registered 945 shots. In his three-plus years as a Penguin, he's already connected 983 times. It works out to an improvement of 1.03 shots per game. The benefits of which have shown up on the scoresheet. Over the past two seasons, Kovalev has 76 goals and 171 points in 146 games.

As if his shooting talents weren't enough, Kovalev also brings unmatched skating and stickhandling skills to the show. There's no describing his hands. He can do anything imaginable with the puck and even a few things that reside beyond the grasp of human comprehension.

Combine his sorcery with abnormal agility and it's not uncommon to see Kovalev control the puck for 30 seconds at a clip. Peter Forsberg and Jaromir Jagr can pull off similar feats, but they rely on their size and strength to carry defenders. Kovy can do it without even getting touched. A subtle headfake is all it takes to leave defenseman clutching at air. Most players have strong backhand moves, but Kovalev can go to either side with equal dexterity. Humiliated victims abound each time he lugs the puck up ice on the power play.

The most underrated part of Kovalev's game is his intense desire to win. He makes things appear so easy on the ice that sometimes his heart can be questioned. Well, it shouldn't be. He's a competitor. He was one of the few Penguins last year to show any emotion as the team fell from grace. With Mario Lemieux sidelined, Kovalev became the leader in and out of the room. And if you want to be a leader, you have to play mean. Kovy isn't scared to end someone's night early. Pity the soul that meets his shoulder. He can crack.

If Kovalev has a flaw it's his damn altruistic nature. He could take over a game at any given moment, but often sits back and tries to get his pesky teammates involved just so they feel part of the group. His selflessness is both admirable and infuriating.

Pittsburgh has been blessed by the offensive brilliance of Lemieux and Jagr, so one would think that Penguin fans have become accustomed to the amazing. Yet Kovalev does things that make even the most jaded of spectators shake his or her head in disbelief.

3. Jarome Iginla, Calgary Flames: Hey, did you hear Iginla at the NHL Awards ceremony? He was up there getting his Art Ross and Maurice Richard Trophies and he told a story about how he read a book when he was a little boy about this kid that had a magic hockey stick. The tyke was scoring all kinds of goals and assists and whatnot until one day his magic stick broke. But then the kid realized the ability was inside him all along, and not in some magic stick. It was truly heartwarming. Ya know, I have my own magic stick. Almost broke it once, too. Couldn't walk for a week. But I digress...

Iginla's 2001-02 season was nothing short of extraordinary. His 52 goals, 44 assists, and 96 points were all career-highs, topping his previous best in goals by 21 and points by 25. That's crazy talk. Usually things don't improve that much without a congressional investigation. It's not as if Iginla didn't give warning. His goals, assists, and points have increased in each of the last four seasons. But how could anyone have expected this?

The big reason for the soar in production was Iginla's shot. Not only did it seem to gain in velocity, its frequency hit new heights. His shot total of 229 in 2000-01 bulged to 311 last year. Can't score if you don't shoot.

Iginla is second to only Todd Bertuzzi in the realm of power forwards, so that makes him the top power forward among Homo sapiens. He can skate like the wind if, you know, the wind had legs. He hits like an aluminum bat, can make plays, and will fight to protect teammates. Plus he knows a lot of rollicking good stories about magic sticks. What's not to like? Now he just needs to do it two years in a row. He won't be catching people by surprise this season. He had 30 goals last year before anyone even knew Calgary still had a team.

4. Jaromir Jagr, Washington Capitals: Are coaches giving you trouble? Are their demanding natures and know-it-all attitudes rubbing you the wrong way? Then you should try JAGR. That's right, JAGR! A new product from the makers of RAID, JAGR will clear up your pesky coach conundrum quick as a whistle. JAGR. Kills coaches. Dead.

Poor Ron Wilson. There he was enjoying the good life in Washington, boasting four years tenure and looking forward to another strong season in the nation's capital. Then his club went and did a very stupid thing. It traded three warm bodies to Pittsburgh for Jaromir Jagr. Wilson never stood a chance.

Wilson's days in Washington were numbered as soon as Jagr donned a Capitals sweater. The man who once guided the beleaguered franchise to a Stanley Cup Finals appearance joined the growing list of coaches that have been left unnerved and unemployed in the wake of Jagr's colossal ego. Since 1996-97, Jagr has run through the likes of Eddie Johnston, Kevin Constantine, Herb Brooks, and Ivan Hlinka en route to becoming a verified coach killer.

It took Wilson and the rest of the Capitals less than a year to find out why the Penguins were so eager to unload the five-time Art Ross winner. Jagr's all oatmeal north of the eyebrows. If he were any flakier, Tony the Tiger would try and frost him. Jagr is to team chemistry what, well, a selfish, emotionally unstable, conceited, lily-livered prima donna of a pansy is to team chemistry. He makes Barry Bonds look like Father Flanagan. The next time Jagr stands up for a teammate will be the first. Sacrifice to him is having to use the same puck as everyone else. He was once caught talking to his agent on a cell phone in the dressing room between periods of a playoff game. His personal motto is "One for me, me for one."

Pittsburgh missed the playoffs for the first time in 12 years, yet the disappointment of Penguin fans everywhere was tempered by the solace taken in seeing Jagr flounder during his first season with the Caps. Injuries cost the Czech Wonder Kid 13 games and his 2000-01 points-per-game average of 1.49 dropped to a less spectacular 1.14. His average shots per game also fell from 3.91 to 2.87. And his sterling presence in the lineup did little to improve the fortunes of the team, as the Capitals failed to make the playoffs despite competing in the watered-down Southeast Division.

Mental problems aside, Jagr remains the best point scorer in hockey not wearing 66. He's the game's most powerful skater. His legs are like oak trees. No one controls the boards like Jagr. If there's a scrum, rest assured he'll come away with the puck. He doesn't have a slap shot, but his wrister is as good as it gets. He's working on 11 consecutive seasons with at least 31 goals.

Washington's front office has done its best to try and make Jagr more comfortable in 2002-03. They got rid of Wilson in favor of a younger, less-established coach by the name of Bruce Cassidy. Too bad it's not Neal Cassidy, because he's gonna be "On the Road" before long.

Then the Caps signed former Penguin and Jagr compatriot Robert Lang to a multi-million dollar contract. Lang is a solid player, but he's not a legitimate No. 1 center. And he never really played that much with Jagr in Pittsburgh, either. Jan Hrdina was Jagr's main center. Lang only played with him on the power play. So, while they should click, their chemistry is far from a given.

The Caps also brought in Kip Miller. And they didn't even lose a bet! Miller's best season as a pro came in 1998-99 when he scored 19 goals and 42 points while skating the left wing for Jagr and Hrdina. Miller seemed to have a reasonable rapport with the enigmatic superstar, but do you want a guy named Kip on your top line?

Jagr is still the most dominating offensive player in the NHL. Fortunately, hockey is about more than just offense. He's a complete waste when it comes to defense, hitting, leadership, and character. Remember, you can't spell "jagoff" without J-A-G-R. Well, you don't really need the R, but you get the point.

5. Pavel Bure, New York Rangers; You know everything I said about Jagr? It pretty much goes for Bure, too. Pavel's pompous, aloof personality has alienated friend and foe alike in two cities. Even the company of his brother couldn't lengthen his stay in Florida. But as long as he keeps putting the puck in the net, there will be no shortage of NHL teams lining up for his services.

A five-time 50-goal scorer, Bure's lit more lamps than the Hoover Dam. He lives for it. If anyone's ever going to score 80 goals again, it'll be Pavel. He has an insatiable appetite for finding the net. Heroin addicts take fewer shots.

Bure's blistering speed is what enables him to post such lofty goal totals. A step and he's gonesville. Once in the open he will more often than not use a precise slap shot to do the deed. He relies on the slapper much more than most top-flight finishers.

Oddly enough, for someone who scores as much as he does, Bure misses an inordinate amount of breakaways. He tends to shoot five-hole a lot. That's great and all if you do something first to get the goalie to open his legs, but Bure insists on skating straight in and shooting without even bothering to deke. A stubborn shooter can be a goaltender's best ally.

Bure seems to have found a home in New York. The bright lights of the big city seem to agree with the Russian Rocket. He scored 12 goals and 20 points in his 12 games as a Ranger. If Eric Lindros can stay healthy, Bure could be on the verge of something special in 2002-03.

6. Peter Bondra, Washington Capitals: For years, Bondra was always the Eastern Conference's answer to Pavel Bure. They're almost mirror images in terms of speed, shooting, and style of play. Now that Pavel's come east, the two snipers remain neck-and-neck in competition for the honor of being recognized as the game's best goal scorer.

Bondra is a four-time 40-goal man and has reached 50 on two separate occasions. He was second in the NHL in shots last year with 333 and has put up 84 goals and 39 power-play tallies over the past two seasons. Just don't expect Bondra to make the extra pass. Only twice in his 12-year career has he completed a season with fewer goals than assists. The best was in 1994-95 when he scored 34 goals to go along with nine big assists. That is some wild, wild stuff.

Peter Gun holds one decisive advantage over Bure. Namely, he's a better teammate. While both men have edges to their game, Bondra will actually retaliate for his chums and not just because someone slashed him or called him a Maltby. Oh yeah, he's also better on breakaways. In alone and he's automatic for the people.

Bure slips ahead of Bondra due to consistency. Pavel's gonna score goals game in and game out. Bondra is prone to extremes. He'll hit a drought and then tear off six goals in three games. When he's hot, he's Africa hot.

The bottom line is that if you're talking goal scoring, and remove Mario Lemieux from the equation, it's Bure, Bondra; one, two.

7. Owen Nolan, San Jose Sharks: Nolan doesn't really have the numbers to warrant inclusion alongside some of his more illustrious peers. Although he's a five-time 30-goal scorer, he had 23 last year and has only one 30+ season in the past five. But Nolan needs a wagon to help him carry all his intangibles. He could open up a produce stand on the corner selling apples, oranges, and intangibles three for a dollar. Someone send Jagr the address.

Nolan's relentless work ethic and willingness to sacrifice make him one of the best leaders in hockey. He'll go through a wall for his teammates. And if he gets to take someone through the wall with him, all the better. Nolan is plain nasty to play against. He hits more than the mob. He's a one-man Corleone Family. His checking helped galvanize Team Canada and was one of the main reasons why the Maple Leaf struck gold. The Olympics had never seen such barbarity without a Gillooly being involved.

Among power forwards, only Billy Guerin can surpass Nolan's speed and quickness. And few big men can pass as well as San Jose's captain. His shot's the thing, tho'. When healthy, Nolan's slap and wrist shots measure up with the NHL's best. Health has been the catch. Nolan has fought through a bad back the past few years and it's taken a toll on his goal output.

8. Daniel Alfredsson, Ottawa Senators: He may not be able to skate as fast as Pavel Bure, shoot as hard as Alexei Kovalev, or hit like Owen Nolan, but Daniel Alfredsson does a little bit of everything at an extremely high level. His game has no weaknesses. He sees the whole ice, protects the puck, works all three zones, plays physical, and is deserving of the "C" on his chest. His name has to be included among the NHL's best all- around players.

The challenge for Alfredsson has been staying healthy. He's been rather brittle. From 1997-98 to 1999-00, Alfredsson missed an average of 25 games per season. He's been x-rayed more times than airport luggage. Thankfully, his constitution does seem to be improving. He managed to participate in 68 games in 2000-01 and 78 in 2001-02. The result has been two-straight 70-point seasons, including a career-high 37 goals and 71 points last year.

9. Tony Amonte, Phoenix Coyotes: Ed Belfour, Chris Chelios, Jeremy Roenick, and now Tony Amonte... Chicago has the rare knack of recognizing its best player and then allowing him to leave town without getting much, if anything, in return. It's genius, really. Who needs identity? Heart and soul can be so overrated.

Wayne Gretzky and the Phoenix Coyotes were more than happy to take advantage of Chicago's ignorance, signing Amonte to a multi- million dollar contract to bring him to the desert. Why the Blackhawks would be willing to part with Amonte is puzzling.

Amonte's numbers were down last year. An eight-time 30-goal scorer, his 27 goals in 2001-02 snapped a string of six consecutive seasons with at least 30 red lights. But if the Hawks are betting Amonte has nothing left, they're fooling themselves. He still has the speed and shot to put up another 35 or 40 goals this season for the Coyotes. If anything it was the grief of his contract situation that hampered his scoring, not a deterioration of skills.

Amonte could score 10 goals and he'd still be a tremendous addition to any club. No one works harder. He plays every shift like it's his last. He's not some pretty boy goal scorer living off the sweat of his teammates. Amonte does all his own dirty work. And you know he's gonna show up every night. Amonte hasn't missed a game in five years, and he's only missed two contests over the past eight seasons. Death and taxes aren't so reliable.

10. Bill Guerin, Dallas Stars: The Dallas Stars are going to pay Guerin $9 million. He had 66 points last year. When did 66 points become worth $9 million? Sure, Guerin is coming off two straight 40-goal seasons, but he's hardly a tried and tested commodity. 1998-99 was the only other time in his career that he scored as many as 30 goals. Take away the 85-game, 85-point season of 2000-01, and his 66 points last year would have been a career-high. As it is, he's only broken 50 points four times in 10 seasons. And he's gonna get $9 million! That's Bobby Holik money, for cryin' out loud! I sure picked the wrong time to go into the janitorial field.

Guerin's got the tools. He's a strapping lad with a swift step and a scorching wrist shot who will fight when he hears the bell. But he is working on his fourth team in six years. He's worn out his share of welcome mats. Guerin should be a lock for 40 goals and 85 points every year. If he can't put it together skating with Mike Modano, he never will.

Milan Hejduk, Colorado Avalanche: Hejduk got off to a miserable start last year, scoring just three goals in his first 24 games. Then there was a nasty nine-game goalless streak before an abdominal strain ended his season early. But if you take away the first 24 outings and the nine right before the injury, Hejduk scored at his usual pace of 18 goals in 29 games. So, see, it wasn't so bad. Aw, who am I kidding?

Milan's hands are on par with Kovalev's and he can put a puck through a keyhole. Anything less than 40 goals is silly. He should come up large in 2002-03.

Marian Hossa, Ottawa Senators: Although his points dropped from 75 to 66 last year, the 23-year-old has strung together two straight 30-goal seasons. Hossa's confounding mix of size and speed, not to mention his crafty hands, has most NHL defensemen filing for protection from abuse. His shot total has increased every year, reaching a high of 278 in 2001-02. Hossa should be a point-per-game guy this season.

Ziggy Palffy, Los Angeles Kings: It was hard keeping Palffy off the list. He's a dynamic player. But Ziggy is a notch below Bure and Bondra when it comes to scoring goals, he's not as solid an all-around player as Alfredsson or Amonte, and Nolan and Guerin could flat kick his ass. Besides, do you think Ziggy cares if he's in the top ten? Have you seen his wife? Good lord. Now that's an accomplishment. Ziggy's best stats would seem to be around 36-24-36.

Marian Gaborik, Minnesota Wild: Gaborik spit in the eye of the sophomore jinx, running his goals from 18 to 30, assists from 18 to 37, and points from 36 to 67 in his second year of NHL duty. This kid can motor. Minnesota hasn't seen anything this exciting since Mary Tyler Moore threw her hat in the air.

Martin Havlat, Ottawa Senators: Ottawa is teeming with talent on the right side. As if Alfredsson and Hossa weren't enough, the Sens also have young Marty Havlat knocking on the door of superstardom. The 21-year-old is fun to watch. He's capable of the incredible on every shift. His big-play ability is displayed in the fact that 11 of his 41 career goals are game- winners. Havlat's also shown some toughness in his short career. Not punch-someone-in-the-skull-until-they-bleed-out-the-ears toughness, but the ol' Timex toughness where he'll take a licking and keep on ticking.

The Senators are gonna have to remove the reins from Havlat. He's got two years under his belt. It's time to shine. In order to do that, he's going to have to switch positions. He can't keep skating on a third line. Ottawa gave Shawn McEachern the heave ho over the summer, so that opens up a slot on left wing. Whether on the left side or at center, Havlat needs to be on the ice with either Alfredsson or Hossa.

Dany Heatley. Atlanta Thrashers: The Atlanta Thrashers got really cool really fast. With Heatley and Ilya Kovalchuk patrolling the ice, Thrasher games have suddenly become must see TV. Heatley's a complete player. He's every bit as substantial as Kovalchuk is stylish. A big, powerful skater, Heatley loves to drive the net. He does his best work in tight around the cage and has the hands to either create or finish. Atlanta's equipment man might as well start stitching the "C" on Heatley's sweater now.

Theo Fleury, Chicago Blackhawks: Last season was like "Theo Interrupted." It was rather unsettling watching the little fella have a mental breakdown on a nightly basis. He just snapped in the gulliver. Scoring took a backseat to pouting and verbal vilification of officials. Fleury's 2000-01 points-per-game average of 1.19 plunged to 0.77 last season while his penalty minutes rose from 122 to a career-worst 216. The Rangers put Theo's bags outside the door, handed him his frying pan, and asked that he never return. Maybe Snow White is looking to add a dwarf? Could she use one named Loopy?

Glen Murray, Boston Bruins: Guess who led the Bruins in scoring last season. Go ahead, guess. Nope, it wasn't Joe Thornton. Not Sergei Samsonov. Not Billy Guerin. Try Glen Murray. Good ol' Muz paced the Boston attack with a career-high 41 goals and 71 points. It was the first time he had ever scored more than 29 goals. Murray always had the shot of a scorer. His wrister is extremely heavy. It also used to be extremely errant. His 246 shots last year were by far the most of his career, beating his previous best by 44. With Guerin gone, the pressure will be on Murray to prove 2001-02 wasn't an aberration.

Brett Hull, Detroit Red Wings: At 38, Hull is starting to slow down. He scored 30 last season, but it was a nine-goal drop from the year before and his point total also fell by 16. He has proven durable in his old age, missing only six games over the past three seasons. Hull can still score clutch goals, but he won't be getting into the 40-goal neighborhood again without a bus pass.

Mark Recchi, Philadelphia Flyers: The Recchin' Ball has seen better days. He had just 64 points last season and hasn't bagged 30 goals since he had 32 in 1997-98. Recchi also failed miserably when it came to providing the wayward Flyers with some veteran leadership in the playoffs. Usually guys have to jump a fence and slip through some barbwire to be so AWOL.

Teemu Selanne, San Jose Sharks: Selanne's 54 points, aside from being generally embarrassing, were the fewest he's had since 1993-94 when injuries held him to 54 points in 51 games. The Finnish Flash isn't as flashy, or as fast, as he used to be. A five-time 40-goal man, and three-time 50-goal scorer, Selanne's point total has declined in each of the last three seasons and he hasn't scored more than 33 goals since 1998-99. Diminishing returns or not, Selanne is still cooler than a Helsinki winter.

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