In the dog-eat-dog world of sports correspondence, many reporters
shy away from hard hitting pieces out of fear that players will
rebel by no longer granting interviews. But here at LCS Hockey,
where we can't get within 15 feet of the players without violating
long-standing restraining orders, we are never granted interviews
anyway so we can pretty much say whatever we want to.
That said, I'd like to take this opportunity at the season's halfway
point to do two things. The first is to thank Dave Bell-Irving, who
seems to be the only person excited by this column enough to send
e-mail (and some disturbing photos). The second is give each Canuck a
grade based on performance, general attractiveness and jersey
cleanliness. Here goes...
Forwards
Markus Naslund: A. Tied for fourth in the league for goal scoring
as of press time. Not bad for a guy who started the season below
Bert Robertsson on the depth chart. Pavel who?
Mark Messier: B+. Proving that he can still be a first-line centre
at his current point-a -game pace (sorry I ever doubted you, big
guy !).
Bill Muckalt: A-. Leading all rookies in goals and points. Good
speed, consistent and he even hits. If only LCS Hockey could put in
a Calder Trophy vote.
Alex Mogilny: B+. Has been consistently good when healthy. Looks
good with Messier but he should give the white skates back to
Kristi Yamaguchi.
Dave Scatchard: B. Solid and always physical. With luck will hit 20
goals.
Brad May, Peter Zezel, Trent Klatt: C. How about a few goals guys.
I'm not expecting an offensive dynamo, but these three veterans sure
didn't pick it up with Mogilny and Bertuzzi out.
Donald Brashear: C+. Somebody must have told Donald that he's a
scorer. He's got nothing to prove as a fighter but that doesn't
mean he has to stop.
Steve Staios, Todd Bertuzzi, Matt Cooke, Bert Robertsson and Chris
McAllister all receive my heartiest congratulations for not doing
anything that deserves criticism. In Bertuzzi's case it's because
he's only played 10 games. A pat on the back to Harry York, who's
been effective so far, and who looks better after the hair cut.
Defence
Mattias Ohlund: B. Has been great at times and average at others.
Logs close to 25 minutes a night, so we can't blame him for the
occasional mental lapse in his second season. Needs to get the shot
off more.
Adrian Aucoin: B+. Has stepped in much like Naslund as a surprise
contributor. His 11 goals and solid defensive play has earned him a
spot as Keenan's fourth d-man.
Bryan McCabe: B. Solid since signing in mid-November. Occasionally
an offensive threat but needs to tighten up his own zone
coverage. Still young with great prospects.
Bret Hedican: B-. Engaged to Kristi Yamaguchi! Should be a 40-50
point guy but the offence only shows glimmers of coming around.
Never a liability though.
Murray Baron: C+. Slow and steady wins the race. I sure hope so if
a million more could have landed Dmitri Mironov. An upgrade from
Murzyn and Huscroft, but won't be confused with Jyrki Lumme any
time soon.
Jason Strudwick: C+. Nothing special but doesn't hurt as a sixth
defenceman. Any guy whose name rhymes with Studwick can't be that
bad.
Jamie Huscroft and Dana Murzyn: Tough, big. If you don't have
anything nice to say...
Goalies
Garth Snow: B+. Beginning to show some wear but stole us some early
on. Shares Team MVP honours with Naslund, and has saved Burke the
embarrassment of stalling for months finding a goalie.
Corey Hirsch: B-. Has been capable as a back-up and recorded a
recent shut-out versus Dallas. Doesn't let in many soft ones and
that's what you asked from your second-string.
I'm not even going to bother grading management, as anyone who has
read this column before knows how much I love Brian Burke (like wet
mittens!) while Keenan has done an admirable job of keeping
together a group who could be much worse. Will be helped by
Bertuzzi/Mogilny's return and who knows...maybe Pavel will actually
be traded some time soon! Speaking of which, rumours are that
Florida's a possible destination (Jovanoski, Dvorak and ?). I'd
take a bag of pucks and a friendly note to end this soap opera (and
that's why I'm not a GM). The lack of actual team information this
issue is a result of the Canucks' incredible achievement in the
field of sucking recently.
There will hopefully be some happy news by the 27th, or else I'll be
forced to submit this report again. Happy New Year to LCS Hockey
readers everywhere, especially my history teacher, Wayne Axford.
(Editor's note: I would also like to give a shout out to Mr.
Axford. Anyone who can put up with our little Ace
Reporter-in-training has to be a good guy.)
