LCS Hockey - Thanks, Expansion!

Thanks, Expansion!
by Michael Dell, editor-in-chief

The season isn't even a week old, yet it already seems clear that the level of play has improved dramatically from last year. Games now actually have flow. Teams are waging contests with plenty of back-and-forth action, putting a greater emphasis on speed and skill instead of clutching and grabbing. As amazing as it sounds, it's almost fun to watch hockey again. Almost.

While the game's tempo has increased, the talent level is at an all-time low. It's really just pathetic. Expansion has crippled the sport. The Green Death has ravaged NHL rosters, spreading the legitimate talent desperately thin and creating so many jobs for undeserving players that the line between the major and minor leagues hasn't just been blurred, it's been obliterated.

Even though the games have been more wide open, it's hard not to notice that most teams are still struggling to score more than two or three goals a night. And it's not because of the crease rule or over-sized goaltending equipment. The reason is simply that there isn't enough talent to supply 27 teams. Overall, the style of games may have improved, but what's the point if there aren't enough NHL-caliber scorers to finish this novel surplus of chances?

Reading the current NHL rosters can be quite the confounding experience. In the immortal words of Jerry Seinfeld, "Who are these people?" Apparently clubs are just picking players off the street, because I believe I saw a few of my next-door neighbors playing defense for Pittsburgh on opening night. And the sad thing was, they didn't look out of place.

Clearly, this is not the NHL LCS Hockey, and so many other fans, first came to love; the one that featured teams with three solid lines and six deep on defense. Now clubs are lucky to have one scoring line and three dependable defensemen. Things have changed. It's sort of like the friend that comes home after a few years at college. He's still the same kid as before, but now he listens to different music, always smells a bit like weed, and can't communicate complete thoughts without laughing and staring at his hand. While it can still be fun to hang out with him, things tend to get old when the only topics open for discussion are Doritos and old Cheech and Chong movies. Soon, more and more time passes between phone calls until eventually you lose touch. I haven't called the NHL in months.

Expansion is the evil behind it all. The league would still be awesome today if it only had 21 teams. An argument could even be made that 24 teams would be acceptable, since the Golden Year of 1992-93 was played with San Jose, Tampa Bay, and Ottawa in the mix. But fewer is definitely better.

Just consider the numbers. There are now six more clubs than there were back in 1990-91. With an average of 23 players per roster, that means there are at least 138 guys in the NHL today thanks solely to expansion. That's 138 minor-pros masquerading as big-leaguers. And it's only going to get worse, as Atlanta, Minnesota, and Columbus will all join the league in the next couple years, creating 69 more imposters. NHL, we hardly knew ye.

This whole mess got me thinking, exactly who are the 138 players that owe their jobs to expansion? So, what the hell? I made a list.

Keep in mind, this isn't meant to be ignorant. And it's not like all these guys are lousy players. Some are youngsters that could become solid citizens, but, at this stage in their careers, their spots would most likely be filled by proven veterans if there were still enough proven veterans to go around.

It should also be noted that a whole lot of thought didn't go into the list, these are just the first 138 guys that caught my eye. This is merely an attempt to put in perspective the watered down state of the NHL. So if you see your name, or the name of someone you admire, listed below, please do not take offense. There are many more important things to take offense to in the pages of LCS Hockey. Save the letters on this one.

Players are listed by team.

Ted Drury, Anaheim
Dominic Roussel, Anaheim
Jeff Nielsen, Anaheim
Antii Aalto, Anaheim
Pascal Trepanier, Anaheim
Johan Davidsson, Anaheim
Mike LeClerc, Anaheim
Matt Cullen, Anaheim
Mike Crowley, Anaheim
Chris Taylor, Boston
Antii Laaksonen, Boston
Peter Nordstrom, Boston
Peter Ferraro, Boston
Ken Baumgartner, Boston
Rob Tallas, Boston
James Patrick, Buffalo
Wayne Primeau, Buffalo
Jason Holland, Buffalo
Dwayne Roloson, Buffalo
Dave Roche, Calgary
Ed Ward, Calgary
Eric Charron, Calgary
Greg Pankewicz, Calgary
Steve Smith, Calgary
Clarke Wilm, Calgary
Martin St. Louis, Calgary
Paul Ranheim, Carolina
Nolan Pratt, Carolina
Arturs Irbe, Carolina
Alain Nasreddine, Chicago
Craig Mills, Chicago
Remi Royer, Chicago
Ty Jones, Chicago
Mark Fitzpatrick, Chicago
Dan Smith, Colorado
Jeff Odgers, Colorado
Shean Donovan, Colorado
Tony Hrkac, Dallas
Brent Severyn, Dallas
Jamie Wright, Dallas
Joey Kocur, Detroit
Mathieu Dandenault, Detroit
Kevin Brown, Edmonton
Boyd Devereaux, Edmonton
Bob Essensa, Edmonton
Pat Falloon, Edmonton
Fredrik Lindquist, Edmonton
Craig Millar, Edmonton
Dwayne Hay, Florida
Peter Worrell, Florida
Johan Garpenlov, Florida
Nathan Lafayette, Los Angeles
Josh Green, Los Angeles
Sandy Moger, Los Angeles
Brett Clark, Montreal
Sergei Zholtok, Montreal
Trent McCleary, Montreal
Miroslav Guren, Montreal
Craig Rivet, Montreal
J.J. Daigneault, Nashville
Jay More, Nashville
Darren Turcotte, Nashville
Greg Johnson, Nashville
Jamie Heward, Nashville
John Slaney, Nashville
Jeff Nelson, Nashville
Brad Smyth, Nashville
Andrew Brunette, Nashville
Patrick Cote, Nashville
Brad Bombardir, New Jersey
Sergei Brylin, New Jersey
Sheldon Souray, New Jersey
Bryan Muir, New Jersey
Sasha Lakovic, New Jersey
Mike Hough, NY Islanders
Wade Flaherty, NY Islanders
Barry Richter, NY Islanders
David Harlock, NY Islanders
Mike Watt, NY Islanders
Eric Brewer, NY Islanders
Michael Knuble, NY Rangers
Scott Fraser, NY Rangers
Todd Harvey, NY Rangers
P.J. Stock, NY Rangers
Geoff Smith, NY Rangers
Esa Tikkanen, NY Rangers
Jan Mertzig, NY Rangers
Brent Fedyk, NY Rangers
Andreas Johansson, Ottawa
David Oliver, Ottawa
Patrick Traverse, Ottawa
Sami Salo, Ottawa
Ron Tugnutt, Ottawa
Mike Maneluk, Philadelphia
Dmitri Tertshny, Philadelphia
Dave Babych, Philadelphia
Colin Forbes, Philadelphia
Mike Stapleton, Phoenix
Bryan Helmer, Phoenix
Mike Sullivan, Phoenix
Scott Langkow, Phoenix
Peter Skudra, Pittsburgh
Brad Werenka, Pittsburgh
Rob Brown, Pittsburgh
Jeff Serowik, Pittsburgh
Patrick Lebeau, Pittsburgh
Ian Moran, Pittsburgh
Victor Ignatjev, Pittsburgh
Jan Hrdina, Pittsburgh
Kip Miller, Pittsburgh
Maxim Galanov, Pittsburgh
Scott Hannan, San Jose
Jamie Baker, San Jose
Jarrod Skalde, San Jose
Ron Sutter, San Jose
Marty Reasoner, St. Louis
Pascal Rheaume, St. Louis
Michal Handzus, St. Louis
Mikael Andersson, Tampa Bay
Steve Kelly, Tampa Bay
Enrico Ciccone, Tampa Bay
Garry Valk, Toronto
Yannick Tremblay, Toronto
Daniil Markov, Toronto
Tomas Kaberle, Toronto
Igor Korolev, Toronto
Dave Scatchard, Vancouver
Adrian Aucoin, Vancouver
Bill Muckalt, Vancouver
Jamie Huscroft, Vancouver
Bert Robertsson, Vancouver
Steve Staios, Vancouver
Jason Strudwick, Vancouver
Markus Naslund, Vancouver
Garth Snow, Vancouver
Corey Hirsch, Vancouver
Matthew Herr, Washington